Partners in Shine!

One day, when I was browsing through motivational videos, and I came across someone named Alexi Panos. She is currently engaged, to be married within the week! She posted something with her fiancé, then put the hashtag #partnersinshine (see above photo).

I evaluated my love life and decided that the man I was going after wasn't stepping up in the way I needed him to. Not because he wasn't good enough, but because he had difficulty seeing the light. I knew that I would always have to put in 110% trying to lift his spirits. I realized that I would be trying to show him the light, but that he wouldn't even be trying to search for it himself.

For someone who is as fast-paced at me, especially in personal growth, I can't have someone who I'd have to drag along to be by my side. I need someone who is able to keep up with me and who wouldn't be quick to blame me for every problem that arises. I needed someone who would see my growth instead of holding my past against me.

Now, I'm under the impression that whatever we had between us is officially over. And you know what? He still blames me for everything that comes up. He will still get upset if I try to tell him the way his actions made me feel, and say that I'm being dramatic, negative, or that I like to argue. I have never heard any of these comments from anyone else, so that probably should've been my first red flag. *Side note: I take criticism pretty well and am actually like "okay I could see that, can we work on this?" even if it is entirely false. I'm not saying there is a 100% chance that his criticisms were false, but sadly, there's also the possibility that he was 1) criticizing inaccurate flaws to manipulate me or 2) saying things to make me feel less valuable while he made himself appear accepting of my supposed flaws.

You can only try so hard for so long. Simply liking or loving someone isn't enough. When someone starts to take away your shine, it's time to go. When someone starts being negative and refuses to work things out, get up and find the strength to leave! Let me clarify though, that this isn't to say that anytime an issue arises, you should leave. Learning how to communicate, compromise, and resolve problems is important. Relationships are supposed to be selfless, but when there's never any progress, and you feel beaten down, you're better off if you move on.

Life Tip #2: Surround yourself with positive people who are not laid back in their endeavors in life. Find someone who won't compromise for anything less than they deserve because they know their worth. Search inside yourself, find the good in you, and be that same type of person. Don't settle for anyone who takes away your shine! Know your worth!